Thank you for this article, very interesting!
I would be careful with one statement here though “The official definition of burnout is “physical or mental collapse caused by overwork or stress”. That kind of implies that a person can’t work when burnt out, but that’s not my experience- ceasing work when you’re burnt out is a privilege.”
I think when reading this, it’s easy to come away with the impression that a burnout is actually not so bad. While it may not be so bad in some cases, it can be very severe in others, so severe that you’re literally physically unable to work—sometimes for years.
There are recent studies showing that a burnout can lead to changes in the anatomy and functioning of the brain, e.g. reduced connectivity between different areas of the brain, an enlarged amygdala, and a thinned prefrontal cortex, which is the part responsible for cognitive functioning, meaning that even if you try really hard, you just cannot function as well as you used to (or at all).
I had a burnout myself several years ago and I felt like I wasn’t able to access some parts of my brain and couldn’t do some things that I can normally do (e.g. write a text, do calculations, or concentrate for more than a minute). It took me more than 6 months to feel that I restored my full cognitive capacity.
Thanks for sharing! I’d also like to share my experience, which is quite different from yours, just to give a different perspective.
My currently 15-month old daughter neither sleeps through the night, nor does she nap for 3 hours during daytime. We currently have on average 2 nightly wake-ups, which varies a bit every day. Sometimes she falls asleep again quickly, sometimes she keeps us awake for several hours. Typically, she naps for 1.5 hours around lunch time.
I talk to many people with kids of a similar age, and there seems to be a very large range of experiences (from 3-year olds frequently waking up 3-4x at night to newborns sleeping through the night from day 1), so I don’t have the impression that we are strong outliers.
Before I became a parent, I was mentally prepared for a few months of sleep deprivation, but I had no idea that this can go on for years.
Also, I think the daycare situation varies a lot across countries. In Germany (where I live), there are not enough daycare spots for all kids, and I know some parents who had to delay going back to work by several months or even years simply because no daycare spot was available. We were very lucky to find a spot on time, but it’s not something everyone (at least here) can count on.