I worry that race is a poor analogy here and may lead to more heat than light being generated in this discussion. Race has little bearing on dynamics around sex and relationships, while the mono/​poly distinction does substantially impact them. I totally agree that it’s unfair to stigmatize all poly men as abusers, but I think it’s fair to consider whether the high rate of poly folks in the EA community creates unique considerations when thinking about community norms.
I worry that race is a poor analogy here and may lead to more heat than light being generated in this discussion. Race has little bearing on dynamics around sex and relationships, while the mono/​poly distinction does substantially impact them. I totally agree that it’s unfair to stigmatize all poly men as abusers, but I think it’s fair to consider whether the high rate of poly folks in the EA community creates unique considerations when thinking about community norms.