this comment is frustrating to read as a woman who has experienced unwanted sexual harassment/attention in the EA community
Sorry to hear that.
To clarify my perspective more broadly, I’ll link to an older comment I made: “Even in the hypothetical where you dotted every possible i and crossed every possible t, getting affirmative verbal consent for every individual muscle movement as though you were in some sort of parody video—if she feels violated afterwards, something went wrong.”
I personally have spent so much of my own time gently and patiently trying to explain to “awkward” men why their behaviour sucks. I’m so tired.
It seems to me that this is a valuable activity and it would be good if it was possible to do it in a more scalable way, to improve the benefit-to-effort ratio. Obviously if you’re feeling burnt out on it, you should take a break.
I’m sorry you’re feeling tired.
(Side note: I had some responses to your other points, but I kept deleting them because I didn’t have a good theory of how they would help move the discussion forwards. It felt like there was a danger of getting lost in the weeds in an “ordinary internet argument” which didn’t contribute to any “action-relevant” important broader point. If you want to discuss more, maybe you could articulate specific important broader points you think we disagree on that would be good to hash out. Alternatively, if you want to have an ordinary internet argument, we could move this to a different medium, e.g. you can send me a private message.)
Sorry to hear that.
To clarify my perspective more broadly, I’ll link to an older comment I made: “Even in the hypothetical where you dotted every possible i and crossed every possible t, getting affirmative verbal consent for every individual muscle movement as though you were in some sort of parody video—if she feels violated afterwards, something went wrong.”
It seems to me that this is a valuable activity and it would be good if it was possible to do it in a more scalable way, to improve the benefit-to-effort ratio. Obviously if you’re feeling burnt out on it, you should take a break.
I’m sorry you’re feeling tired.
(Side note: I had some responses to your other points, but I kept deleting them because I didn’t have a good theory of how they would help move the discussion forwards. It felt like there was a danger of getting lost in the weeds in an “ordinary internet argument” which didn’t contribute to any “action-relevant” important broader point. If you want to discuss more, maybe you could articulate specific important broader points you think we disagree on that would be good to hash out. Alternatively, if you want to have an ordinary internet argument, we could move this to a different medium, e.g. you can send me a private message.)