Great post! We all know encouragement is often great, but I hadn’t considered that it might be necessary or more effective in those specific situations.One of the things that caught my attention in your personal experience is that the person was a recent acquaintance. I wonder how friendship might insert other nuances into the process of butt-kicking; I mean, that’s what friends are for, but they may end up being more protective (like “Hey, you’re a great ukulule player, but maybe you should get your Master’s first”), and maybe butt-kicked may end up discounting their feedback because of that (“Of course, you think I can do anything, look at your Christmas Card).
Thank you Ramiro! Excellent point. I think it really depends on the person (how open they are and have been to criticism, if they have a growth-mindset, etc.). I think that overall, my friends have learned that I’m very open to get a little push as long as I’m in the right state of mind.
Regarding “discounting the feedback”: This can be a risk indeed. It happens to me rarely though, because the type of friends kicking my butt are usually very honest giving feedback and I allow them to be honest. The protective kind of friends tend not to do much butt-kicking anyways.