I can totally sympathize. Job seeking sucks, especially if you’re not feeling like an awesome person who everyone would obviously want to employ. I also know from experience that telling you you’re awesome (I don’t know you, but you’re probably awesome) doesn’t necessarily make you feel that way.
I am not a career counselor, but this is the advice I would give you:
Don’t go to grad school unless you’re really sure you want to. Grad school is a really crummy job, and the payoff in terms of career capital is dubious. Most other jobs you can get are better than grad school, even if they’re not in your field.
It’s not too late for a career change. You sound not excited to enter CS, but if you decided that was your best option, coding bootcamps are a thing, and they seem pretty good at turning STEM oriented people into employable coders. There are a lot of other places you could go, and a lot of jobs that don’t have much more qualification than some college degree.
Earning to give is not the only EA career option. If it won’t make you happy, you’ll probably just get burnt out on it and maybe resent EA for making you feel like you had to do that. http://www.benkuhn.net/career-ideas has a list of career ideas that aren’t earning to give, and it’s extremely incomplete.
Also don’t feel like you have to be passionate about the first job you take (or the second or the third). If you don’t know what you want to do, you try things until something works. I also think that a lot of people start jobs that they don’t feel passionate about, and then grow passionate about them over time, so not feeling like there’s anything exciting for you right now doesn’t mean that you’ll never have a job you’re excited about.
Lots of people graduate without a job or a plan. As long as you have some savings or someone you can stay with for a while, waiting until you’re out of school and have time and space to think about your life is a totally reasonable plan.
I’m happy to talk more or help you brainstorm ideas besides grad school or industry in something your not excited over PM if you think that will help.
I can totally sympathize. Job seeking sucks, especially if you’re not feeling like an awesome person who everyone would obviously want to employ. I also know from experience that telling you you’re awesome (I don’t know you, but you’re probably awesome) doesn’t necessarily make you feel that way.
I am not a career counselor, but this is the advice I would give you:
Don’t go to grad school unless you’re really sure you want to. Grad school is a really crummy job, and the payoff in terms of career capital is dubious. Most other jobs you can get are better than grad school, even if they’re not in your field.
It’s not too late for a career change. You sound not excited to enter CS, but if you decided that was your best option, coding bootcamps are a thing, and they seem pretty good at turning STEM oriented people into employable coders. There are a lot of other places you could go, and a lot of jobs that don’t have much more qualification than some college degree.
Earning to give is not the only EA career option. If it won’t make you happy, you’ll probably just get burnt out on it and maybe resent EA for making you feel like you had to do that. http://www.benkuhn.net/career-ideas has a list of career ideas that aren’t earning to give, and it’s extremely incomplete.
Also don’t feel like you have to be passionate about the first job you take (or the second or the third). If you don’t know what you want to do, you try things until something works. I also think that a lot of people start jobs that they don’t feel passionate about, and then grow passionate about them over time, so not feeling like there’s anything exciting for you right now doesn’t mean that you’ll never have a job you’re excited about.
Lots of people graduate without a job or a plan. As long as you have some savings or someone you can stay with for a while, waiting until you’re out of school and have time and space to think about your life is a totally reasonable plan.
I’m happy to talk more or help you brainstorm ideas besides grad school or industry in something your not excited over PM if you think that will help.
hugs and good luck!