Do you disagree with OP? … Do you agree with OP? Or a limited form of it? If so, just say that...
I did try to say what I think, in my top-level comment. To be more explicit, though, I mostly agree but think that it’s missing important considerations even on its own terms. I think it’s good for EAs to think over the issues raised in the post and the comments, and expect that when some people do that they’ll decide to change how they approach interactions within EA. I think on balance the ways people make decisions about who to sleep with after reading this post will lead them to be slightly personally happier, and will also lead to a slightly healthier EA community.
Why are you nitpicking people?
People are often responding by saying that the only acceptable norm is consent, but then it turns out that they actually are in favor of stricter norms in a variety of situations. As someone who is interested in figuring out whether there are better norms it makes sense to try and push the community towards, I think it’s important that we acknowledge that both current norms and ideal norms are more complex than “anything consensual.” I followed up with Consent Isn’t Always Enough to get into this more.
Let other people have their emotional reactions.
I agree it’s important for people to be able to have emotional reactions and process things, but I think a Forum culture of ignoring the text of what people are actually saying would be disrespectful and harmful.
I did try to say what I think, in my top-level comment. To be more explicit, though, I mostly agree but think that it’s missing important considerations even on its own terms. I think it’s good for EAs to think over the issues raised in the post and the comments, and expect that when some people do that they’ll decide to change how they approach interactions within EA. I think on balance the ways people make decisions about who to sleep with after reading this post will lead them to be slightly personally happier, and will also lead to a slightly healthier EA community.
People are often responding by saying that the only acceptable norm is consent, but then it turns out that they actually are in favor of stricter norms in a variety of situations. As someone who is interested in figuring out whether there are better norms it makes sense to try and push the community towards, I think it’s important that we acknowledge that both current norms and ideal norms are more complex than “anything consensual.” I followed up with Consent Isn’t Always Enough to get into this more.
I agree it’s important for people to be able to have emotional reactions and process things, but I think a Forum culture of ignoring the text of what people are actually saying would be disrespectful and harmful.