I was on the fence between posting this under my name vs. using an anonymous account. I decided to go ahead, because this is something I’ve discussed with other folks and it’s something I feel pretty strongly about. I wanted to write this comment both to validate your experience and to say a few words about how I see the path forward.
I’ve had those experiences too: feeling dismissed, shut down, or like I’m not worth someone’s time.
But—and maybe this is because I have a stubborn, contrary, slightly masochistic, “oh yeah? I’ll show you” streak—I stuck around. I’m not saying that this is the only way to go; if hanging out with other people in the EA community is causing you pain, I don’t want that for you and it is 100% OK to go and do your own thing.
But if you can: stick around.
Because here’s the thing: not everyone is like that. I’d go so far as to say that folks with the attitude above are in the minority. There are SO many humane, warm, kind people in this movement. There are people with a sense of humor and a healthy bit of self-doubt and a generous willingness to meet others where they are. When I hang out with them, I feel inspired to work harder and do more good and to continue to be part of this community. And I’ve made it my task to find those people, encourage them, and make sure they stick around too.
If you (and I’m addressing anyone reading this, not just James) have a vision for what you want a given community to look like, you can stick around and help bring it to life. We get to create the communities we want to be a part of—how awesome is that? For my part, that’s what I’m striving to do. And I’m here to encourage others to do the same.
I was on the fence between posting this under my name vs. using an anonymous account. I decided to go ahead, because this is something I’ve discussed with other folks and it’s something I feel pretty strongly about. I wanted to write this comment both to validate your experience and to say a few words about how I see the path forward.
I’ve had those experiences too: feeling dismissed, shut down, or like I’m not worth someone’s time.
But—and maybe this is because I have a stubborn, contrary, slightly masochistic, “oh yeah? I’ll show you” streak—I stuck around. I’m not saying that this is the only way to go; if hanging out with other people in the EA community is causing you pain, I don’t want that for you and it is 100% OK to go and do your own thing.
But if you can: stick around.
Because here’s the thing: not everyone is like that. I’d go so far as to say that folks with the attitude above are in the minority. There are SO many humane, warm, kind people in this movement. There are people with a sense of humor and a healthy bit of self-doubt and a generous willingness to meet others where they are. When I hang out with them, I feel inspired to work harder and do more good and to continue to be part of this community. And I’ve made it my task to find those people, encourage them, and make sure they stick around too.
If you (and I’m addressing anyone reading this, not just James) have a vision for what you want a given community to look like, you can stick around and help bring it to life. We get to create the communities we want to be a part of—how awesome is that? For my part, that’s what I’m striving to do. And I’m here to encourage others to do the same.