I find your comment slightly confusing, as it suggests—even on the most charitable reading of your comment I can muster—that if a sex partner is not enthusiastic, the sex must be ipso facto rape. Where does this leave men who start having sex and then lose their enthusiasm for whatever reason, whether physical or psychological hangups, I wonder… or does your definition of rape only apply to the woman’s enthusiasm?
(Disclaimer: I am Denise’s partner, have discussed this with her before, and so it’s unsurprising if I naturally interpreted her comment differently.)
Enthusiasm =! consent. I’m not sure where enthusiasm made it into your charitable reading.
Denise’s comment was deliberately non-gendered, and we would both guess (though without data) that once you move to the fuzzy ‘insufficient evidence of consent’ section of the spectrum there will be lots of women doing this, possibly even accounting for the majority of such cases in some environments.
I find your comment slightly confusing, as it suggests—even on the most charitable reading of your comment I can muster—that if a sex partner is not enthusiastic, the sex must be ipso facto rape. Where does this leave men who start having sex and then lose their enthusiasm for whatever reason, whether physical or psychological hangups, I wonder… or does your definition of rape only apply to the woman’s enthusiasm?
(Disclaimer: I am Denise’s partner, have discussed this with her before, and so it’s unsurprising if I naturally interpreted her comment differently.)
Enthusiasm =! consent. I’m not sure where enthusiasm made it into your charitable reading.
Denise’s comment was deliberately non-gendered, and we would both guess (though without data) that once you move to the fuzzy ‘insufficient evidence of consent’ section of the spectrum there will be lots of women doing this, possibly even accounting for the majority of such cases in some environments.
Agreed that Denise’s comment didn’t equate enthusiasm and consent, but in UK law at least:
> the legal test has long been whether it was reasonable for a defendant to think she consented at the time
So someone’s enthusiasm during sex can legitimately portray consent – insofar as it would make it reasonable to believe they were consenting.
I am very confused by this reading, it was not what I got from the comment at all.