Having read both your sentence and Scott’s article, I would not have connected these two as saying the same thing without this addition. Given that one sentence in isolation, I’m not able to tell what your intent was.
I think if you’d expanded it to a few sentences, of the form “Here’s what we shouldn’t do, this is why, this is what we should do instead” that may have been better, rather than just the former.
Having read both your sentence and Scott’s article, I would not have connected these two as saying the same thing without this addition. Given that one sentence in isolation, I’m not able to tell what your intent was.
I think if you’d expanded it to a few sentences, of the form “Here’s what we shouldn’t do, this is why, this is what we should do instead” that may have been better, rather than just the former.