Having read both your sentence and Scottâs article, I would not have connected these two as saying the same thing without this addition. Given that one sentence in isolation, Iâm not able to tell what your intent was.
I think if youâd expanded it to a few sentences, of the form âHereâs what we shouldnât do, this is why, this is what we should do insteadâ that may have been better, rather than just the former.
Having read both your sentence and Scottâs article, I would not have connected these two as saying the same thing without this addition. Given that one sentence in isolation, Iâm not able to tell what your intent was.
I think if youâd expanded it to a few sentences, of the form âHereâs what we shouldnât do, this is why, this is what we should do insteadâ that may have been better, rather than just the former.