Two brief theses
Niceness and politeness are over-rated. If someone is saying something stupid and/or evil, it is perfectly fine to tell them in as many words. Y’all niceness folks have been doing jack sh*t to raise the sanity waterline in the world – most if not all of our success comes not from politely persuading people in the Outgroup (booo!) but in reaching out to people who were gonna agree with us anyway; therefore, there’s no real issue in being rude when the situation demands it. (This thesis is held with very little confidence and it might be only due to me being f*cking pissed; I reserve the right to change my mind, of course.)
This one is for the folks at the Parents in Effective Altruism facebork group. Spanking kids is evil, and defending it is stupid and evil. Having any opinion on the matter other than this one is evil. Pointing out supposed methodological flaws of studies that show it severely harms children is also stupid and evil; even if you are right, the point you’d have to prove is not that hitting children somehow does not hurt them – you’d have to prove it is actually beneficial to them to a sufficient extent that it makes up for the obvious inherent evil that is hitting them.
If you’re still struggling with the concept, let me introduce you to the Sweden-Saudi rule of thumb: if the laws in these two countries differ, Sweden is morally right and Saudi Arabia is wrong.
Apparently @Francis and the forum moderation team think there are aspects of this post that could be improved to make it adhere to the Forum’s rules. I am happy to collaborate to edit the post into compliance!