This is the story that I tell myself about myself but I’m really unsure about the accuracy of it.
I was utilitarian since I was a teen (way before I knew the term). I decided to earn-to-give and found out about GiveWell and ACE when researching where to give. I got really interested when I discovered Brian Tomasik’s website after googling something about utilitarianism. Shortly after that I began participating in EA facebook group, I don’t remember how. I saw some people discussing donations and salaries there and they were much higher than mine because I was living in Lithuania. In 2015 I decided to emigrate to London so that I could earn and donate more money. In London, I went to an EA meetup. It was a shock because up until that point I haven’t met anyone who is altruistic and most of the people in my life were alienated by my altruism and tried to talk me out of donating my money. Making friends with other EAs at meetups in London has greatly increased my motivation to do EA stuff. Soon I was spending most of my free time on EA-related activities. Combined with other factors, this has led me to burn out in 2017. I’m not sure I’ve ever fully recovered from it.
I think I keep working on EA stuff now because:
It’s my job and it would be difficult to find a better job even from a purely selfish perspective
I still care about making the world a better place (though not as much as I used to before burning out)
It feels easy and natural to work on EA stuff because my brain is used to think in the utilitarian way and because I hang out with other EAs all the time
However, I have little faith in humans knowing why they do anything so maybe these are not the real reasons.
Some more reasons why I think I keep working on EA stuff:
EA forum’s karma system and comments make it motivating to participate here, I’m slightly addicted to it.
I’m embarrassed to admit it but I have a desire to impress other people and I try to do that by writing EA forum posts. I enjoy social status it gives me in some social situations, etc.
I’m afraid that in some cases these motivations lead me to work on things that are not the most impactful and I try to watch out for that.
Upvoted for being honest about status-related desires. Good to keep an eye on them but I think they can be useful motivators when they’re pointing in the right direction!
This is the story that I tell myself about myself but I’m really unsure about the accuracy of it.
I was utilitarian since I was a teen (way before I knew the term). I decided to earn-to-give and found out about GiveWell and ACE when researching where to give. I got really interested when I discovered Brian Tomasik’s website after googling something about utilitarianism. Shortly after that I began participating in EA facebook group, I don’t remember how. I saw some people discussing donations and salaries there and they were much higher than mine because I was living in Lithuania. In 2015 I decided to emigrate to London so that I could earn and donate more money. In London, I went to an EA meetup. It was a shock because up until that point I haven’t met anyone who is altruistic and most of the people in my life were alienated by my altruism and tried to talk me out of donating my money. Making friends with other EAs at meetups in London has greatly increased my motivation to do EA stuff. Soon I was spending most of my free time on EA-related activities. Combined with other factors, this has led me to burn out in 2017. I’m not sure I’ve ever fully recovered from it.
I think I keep working on EA stuff now because:
It’s my job and it would be difficult to find a better job even from a purely selfish perspective
I still care about making the world a better place (though not as much as I used to before burning out)
It feels easy and natural to work on EA stuff because my brain is used to think in the utilitarian way and because I hang out with other EAs all the time
However, I have little faith in humans knowing why they do anything so maybe these are not the real reasons.
Some more reasons why I think I keep working on EA stuff:
EA forum’s karma system and comments make it motivating to participate here, I’m slightly addicted to it.
I’m embarrassed to admit it but I have a desire to impress other people and I try to do that by writing EA forum posts. I enjoy social status it gives me in some social situations, etc.
I’m afraid that in some cases these motivations lead me to work on things that are not the most impactful and I try to watch out for that.
Upvoted for being honest about status-related desires. Good to keep an eye on them but I think they can be useful motivators when they’re pointing in the right direction!