I think that while this is hard, the person I want to be would want to be replaced in both cases you describe. a) Even if you stay single, you should want to be replaced because it would be better for all three involved. Furthermore, you probably won’t stay single forever and find a new (potentially better fitting) partner. b) If you had very credible evidence that someone else was not hired who is much better than you, you should want to be replaced IMO. But I guess it’s very implausible that you can make this decision better since you have way less information than the university or employer. So this case is probably not very applicable in real life.
I think that while this is hard, the person I want to be would want to be replaced in both cases you describe.
a) Even if you stay single, you should want to be replaced because it would be better for all three involved. Furthermore, you probably won’t stay single forever and find a new (potentially better fitting) partner.
b) If you had very credible evidence that someone else was not hired who is much better than you, you should want to be replaced IMO. But I guess it’s very implausible that you can make this decision better since you have way less information than the university or employer. So this case is probably not very applicable in real life.