Every once in a while, EAs will discourse about whether it’s important to maximise professional status, in order to gain power, in order to do good. The theory of change is fairly straightforward: If you could get invited onto one of the top podcasts, then maybe you could convince Amy Poehler to advocate for farmed animal welfare, which might in turn convince Katy Perry, who could then convince Justin Trudeau, who is probably friends with at least one current world leader, who is probably friends with at least one other, and so on, until you have the whole world.
Unfortunately, it’s hard to find good status guides online due to the convoluted status dynamics of discussing status, which is either a very low or high status depending on the social group you’re optimising for. So, what do you do?
Fear not. I am thrilled to announce the launch of a new consulting organisation called Acquiring Status Institute (ASI).
ASI can increase the combined social status of any organisation’s workforce by at least 10x in just three months. We also write a monthly newsletter, which explains status from first principles.
While we currently expect that reading the newsletter each month for 3 years will 1000x your status, we’re also acutely aware that diligently reading a small organisation’s newsletter every month for 3 years is a relatively low status thing to do. Luckily, we plan to address this problem in issue 13 (which is also when we’ll nonchalantly launch our podcast).
Here is a look at our first newsletter:
How to become High Status at work
Disclaimer: Our team arrived at the below conclusions are exactly three hours of sitting very still and thinking very carefully
You should be surrounded by illegible notes at all times. There should be at least three giant and mobile whiteboards that you pull around with a string, because you have so many ideas.
If you want to signal that you’re a high-dimensional thinker, you could consider swapping the boards and papers for clay or some other moldable material. Maybe 3D isn’t even enough. Maybe your molds are different temperatures. Maybe you have to constantly move them through space. Maybe they strategically decay over time.
You should frequently create constraints around how you work. You only open PDFs, except for presentations which have to be in Keynote. You only take meetings via Slack huddles but you don’t check Slack messages, you only check Signal. Every added barrier is proof that you have a uniquely unusual mind that must be carefully and meticulously navigated, and the inconvenience to others is undoubtedly worthwhile.
You should be commenting on as many strategy documents as possible. You should literally consider hacking your way into documents. Tell everyone you’ve been asked to “clean up” the google drive and you need to be a workspace manager. Then, find the densest docs and start leaving takes.
If you want to take this further, simply react to a few sentences with a heavy plus or a heavy minus emoji. Your opinion is so correct and valued that it need not be explained. Plus, you have so many documents to comment on that you’re too busy for sentences.
Your work space should be so ergonomic that it scares people. You can’t afford a minute of sub-optimal spinal alignment. You are one mouse click away from RSI, at all times.
Worm your way onto meeting invites and then decline them all.
This one is pretty straightforward — everyone wants to talk to you but you simply don’t have the time.
Constantly imply that you know a lot of sensitive and confidential information, and also, you know a lot of important people but you can’t say who.
We hope this first edition has already helped and given you a taste of what’s to come. We look forward to working with many of you! We don’t currently have an email nor a website (not high status), so, I guess we’ll see you when we see you!
Introducing ASI (Acquiring Status Institute)
Every once in a while, EAs will discourse about whether it’s important to maximise professional status, in order to gain power, in order to do good. The theory of change is fairly straightforward: If you could get invited onto one of the top podcasts, then maybe you could convince Amy Poehler to advocate for farmed animal welfare, which might in turn convince Katy Perry, who could then convince Justin Trudeau, who is probably friends with at least one current world leader, who is probably friends with at least one other, and so on, until you have the whole world.
Unfortunately, it’s hard to find good status guides online due to the convoluted status dynamics of discussing status, which is either a very low or high status depending on the social group you’re optimising for. So, what do you do?
Fear not. I am thrilled to announce the launch of a new consulting organisation called Acquiring Status Institute (ASI).
ASI can increase the combined social status of any organisation’s workforce by at least 10x in just three months. We also write a monthly newsletter, which explains status from first principles.
While we currently expect that reading the newsletter each month for 3 years will 1000x your status, we’re also acutely aware that diligently reading a small organisation’s newsletter every month for 3 years is a relatively low status thing to do. Luckily, we plan to address this problem in issue 13 (which is also when we’ll nonchalantly launch our podcast).
Here is a look at our first newsletter:
How to become High Status at work
Disclaimer: Our team arrived at the below conclusions are exactly three hours of sitting very still and thinking very carefully
You should be surrounded by illegible notes at all times. There should be at least three giant and mobile whiteboards that you pull around with a string, because you have so many ideas.
If you want to signal that you’re a high-dimensional thinker, you could consider swapping the boards and papers for clay or some other moldable material. Maybe 3D isn’t even enough. Maybe your molds are different temperatures. Maybe you have to constantly move them through space. Maybe they strategically decay over time.
You should frequently create constraints around how you work. You only open PDFs, except for presentations which have to be in Keynote. You only take meetings via Slack huddles but you don’t check Slack messages, you only check Signal. Every added barrier is proof that you have a uniquely unusual mind that must be carefully and meticulously navigated, and the inconvenience to others is undoubtedly worthwhile.
You should be commenting on as many strategy documents as possible. You should literally consider hacking your way into documents. Tell everyone you’ve been asked to “clean up” the google drive and you need to be a workspace manager. Then, find the densest docs and start leaving takes.
If you want to take this further, simply react to a few sentences with a heavy plus or a heavy minus emoji. Your opinion is so correct and valued that it need not be explained. Plus, you have so many documents to comment on that you’re too busy for sentences.
Your work space should be so ergonomic that it scares people. You can’t afford a minute of sub-optimal spinal alignment. You are one mouse click away from RSI, at all times.
Worm your way onto meeting invites and then decline them all.
This one is pretty straightforward — everyone wants to talk to you but you simply don’t have the time.
Constantly imply that you know a lot of sensitive and confidential information, and also, you know a lot of important people but you can’t say who.
We hope this first edition has already helped and given you a taste of what’s to come. We look forward to working with many of you! We don’t currently have an email nor a website (not high status), so, I guess we’ll see you when we see you!