If you (and therefore other people similar to you) decide to act in a way that causes a lot of harm/suffering to yourself or your family, and you wouldn’t have acted in that way had you never heard about EA, then that would create a causal link between “Alice learns about EA” and “Alice or her family suffer”. From a utilitarian perspective, such a causal link seems extremely harmful (e.g. making it less likely that a random talented/rich person would end up being involved in EA related efforts).
So this is an argument in favor of NOT making such decisions.
But the most important reason not to kill yourself is that you matter. You are a light of sentience in this world and you are suffering. This is also the most important reason to focus on your own health and happiness right now, even if it feels selfish.
Just an additional point to consider:
If you (and therefore other people similar to you) decide to act in a way that causes a lot of harm/suffering to yourself or your family, and you wouldn’t have acted in that way had you never heard about EA, then that would create a causal link between “Alice learns about EA” and “Alice or her family suffer”. From a utilitarian perspective, such a causal link seems extremely harmful (e.g. making it less likely that a random talented/rich person would end up being involved in EA related efforts).
So this is an argument in favor of NOT making such decisions.
But the most important reason not to kill yourself is that you matter. You are a light of sentience in this world and you are suffering. This is also the most important reason to focus on your own health and happiness right now, even if it feels selfish.