Thank you. I agree and disagree in part with the last paragraph in particular. It is very true that we do not live in an ideal world, and therefore should opt for pragmatic, sensible solutions. Virtually every other social movement manages to do just fine without widespread polyamory. Perhaps they’re better off for it? If poly is essentially confined to some cults and EA, surely the default hypothesis should be that it’s clearly societally maladaptive.
An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure, after all, so while the Community Health team clearly needs a complete replacement of its existing personnel, perhaps it would be better if such a team either wasn’t needed or could be far smaller with far less to do. Procedures fail and bureaucracies are clumsy things. No likes the HR department for a reason: surely everyone would be far better off if there was less need for the EA version of it?
With regards to your last sentence, the problem here is that I’m not really talking about “safeguarding and misconduct” issues per se. Women can still have a miserable time in a social scene where there are no real safeguarding problems and no obvious misconduct beyond financial COIs (which polyamory does make inevitable, but hey). Monogamy is not infallible of course, but as a default it just makes everything massively easier when it comes to navigating social dynamics between men and women.
(before someone tells me that no one is poly in their uni EA club, yes I know and that’s also not what I’m talking about here)
Thank you. I agree and disagree in part with the last paragraph in particular. It is very true that we do not live in an ideal world, and therefore should opt for pragmatic, sensible solutions. Virtually every other social movement manages to do just fine without widespread polyamory. Perhaps they’re better off for it? If poly is essentially confined to some cults and EA, surely the default hypothesis should be that it’s clearly societally maladaptive.
An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure, after all, so while the Community Health team clearly needs a complete replacement of its existing personnel, perhaps it would be better if such a team either wasn’t needed or could be far smaller with far less to do. Procedures fail and bureaucracies are clumsy things. No likes the HR department for a reason: surely everyone would be far better off if there was less need for the EA version of it?
With regards to your last sentence, the problem here is that I’m not really talking about “safeguarding and misconduct” issues per se. Women can still have a miserable time in a social scene where there are no real safeguarding problems and no obvious misconduct beyond financial COIs (which polyamory does make inevitable, but hey). Monogamy is not infallible of course, but as a default it just makes everything massively easier when it comes to navigating social dynamics between men and women.
(before someone tells me that no one is poly in their uni EA club, yes I know and that’s also not what I’m talking about here)