Thanks for your post. Here are a few things that I hope are constructive.
“hey, how do you tell when to release subpar work and when to keep improving?”
This might not work for everybody, but I often get this gut feeling of ‘I could stop working now, even though it is clearly not my best work’ when I finish stuff. So I think that it’s about fighting this impulse of perfectionism to make it it better by focusing on this first assessment of alright-ness. And quite often, I receive very good feedback on such works. Of course I could get even better feedback with even better pieces, but then my mental health sinks.
Next to Andy’s hippy friends I am a titan of industry.
Yeah but the issue is that when it comes to grants or work, you are not competing with Andy’s lovely hippies friends, but with people as intense/if not more intense than you. So I would separate two things here. Comparison is good, when it highlights a strength of yours : like, observing that you social abilities and agreeableness are much higher than many EAs or a few that you have in mind. But when it comes to actual work (I’m thinking technical/niche skills), I agree that comparisons are always a thief of joy. Personally, I tend to always evaluate myself less clever/less technically gifted than many of my colleagues or even people working at positions under mine.
You will never impress them until you give up on doing so.
Yeah I agree! But I’d like to see EA working on being able to compliment others/say when they are impressed by someone instead of thinking of it as a vulnerable thing to do. Of course its vulnerable, but I so often felt impressed towards people, then worried that they didn’t find me good enough, to finally learn by someone else that they were actually impressed by my contributions. This ‘not feeling good enough’ is a big anxiety issue among EA, even those who have an established professional status. Being able to express to each other how impressed we are by each other would probably lessen this anxiety. The few times I tried to do that, people showed signs of embarrassment though, so I’m not sure everyone agrees with me here!
Better yet, get curious about why you don’t seem to want to work on it, with “I hate it and want to quit” being one of many options.
And here I feel particularly targeted when I think about my way-too-long-and-painful PhD process! Some things require spite though, and I’m happy I didn’t give up. But this might also not apply to the majority of things.
Thanks for your post. Here are a few things that I hope are constructive.
This might not work for everybody, but I often get this gut feeling of ‘I could stop working now, even though it is clearly not my best work’ when I finish stuff. So I think that it’s about fighting this impulse of perfectionism to make it it better by focusing on this first assessment of alright-ness. And quite often, I receive very good feedback on such works. Of course I could get even better feedback with even better pieces, but then my mental health sinks.
Yeah but the issue is that when it comes to grants or work, you are not competing with Andy’s lovely hippies friends, but with people as intense/if not more intense than you. So I would separate two things here. Comparison is good, when it highlights a strength of yours : like, observing that you social abilities and agreeableness are much higher than many EAs or a few that you have in mind. But when it comes to actual work (I’m thinking technical/niche skills), I agree that comparisons are always a thief of joy. Personally, I tend to always evaluate myself less clever/less technically gifted than many of my colleagues or even people working at positions under mine.
Yeah I agree! But I’d like to see EA working on being able to compliment others/say when they are impressed by someone instead of thinking of it as a vulnerable thing to do. Of course its vulnerable, but I so often felt impressed towards people, then worried that they didn’t find me good enough, to finally learn by someone else that they were actually impressed by my contributions. This ‘not feeling good enough’ is a big anxiety issue among EA, even those who have an established professional status. Being able to express to each other how impressed we are by each other would probably lessen this anxiety. The few times I tried to do that, people showed signs of embarrassment though, so I’m not sure everyone agrees with me here!
And here I feel particularly targeted when I think about my way-too-long-and-painful PhD process! Some things require spite though, and I’m happy I didn’t give up. But this might also not apply to the majority of things.