Dating for impact sounds like a parody of the EA community, and I’m rather not a fan of this degree of instrumentality nor “saving EA time [wasted on Tinder] is EA” takes.
Separately, on models of romantic love: Edward Glaeser used to teach his (partially joke) model of finding love in his Microeconomics class. If I remember correct, it had 2 parts—
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Finding your partner in college or some other organization of diverse, similarly minded, and highly invested folks is likely optimal
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Be very wary of second derivatives—don’t settle for a local minima.
I think a meta that emerges here is: do I have Alice-like feelings because I feel that EA will weaken (or “detract from my issues”) as a rallying call or because I’m concerned with how I’m perceived (both by others and myself), which is why I really appreciated how you framed Alice’s POV as personal and emotional, KT!