Related: Relationships in a post-singularity future can also be set up to work well, so that the setup overdetermines any efforts by the individuals in them.
To me, that takes away the whole point. I don’t think this would feel less problematic if somehow future people decided to add some noise to the setup, such that relationships occasionally fail.
The reason I find any degree of “setup” problematic is because this seems like emphasizing the self-oriented benefits one gets out of relationships, and de-emphasizing the from-you-independent identity of the other person. It’s romantic to think that there’s a soulmate out there who would be just as happy to find you as you are about finding them. It’s not that romantic to think about creating your soulmate with the power of future technology (or society doing this for you).
This is the “person-affecting intuition for thinking about soulmates.” If the other person exists already, I’d be excited to meet them, and would be motivated to put in a lot of effort to make things work, as opposed to just giving up on myself in the face of difficulties. By contrast, if the person doesn’t exist yet or won’t exist in a way independent of my actions, I feel like there’s less of a point/appeal to it.
Related: Relationships in a post-singularity future can also be set up to work well, so that the setup overdetermines any efforts by the individuals in them.
To me, that takes away the whole point. I don’t think this would feel less problematic if somehow future people decided to add some noise to the setup, such that relationships occasionally fail.
The reason I find any degree of “setup” problematic is because this seems like emphasizing the self-oriented benefits one gets out of relationships, and de-emphasizing the from-you-independent identity of the other person. It’s romantic to think that there’s a soulmate out there who would be just as happy to find you as you are about finding them. It’s not that romantic to think about creating your soulmate with the power of future technology (or society doing this for you).
This is the “person-affecting intuition for thinking about soulmates.” If the other person exists already, I’d be excited to meet them, and would be motivated to put in a lot of effort to make things work, as opposed to just giving up on myself in the face of difficulties. By contrast, if the person doesn’t exist yet or won’t exist in a way independent of my actions, I feel like there’s less of a point/appeal to it.