You attribute a sense to me: “I’m sorry you’re sad, but I endorse my actions and may continue them.”
This piece is about how I’ve largely stopped attending EA events. I don’t intend to continue these actions. Also I explicitly do not endorse many of these actions “I would take it back if I could.”
Perhaps you mean that it seems like I intend to continue being social and occasionally touching my friends on the arm or making slightly flirty jokes outside of the EA community. I am more careful these days, but yes I do. Is this your issue?
You say “Many men—including those who are neurodivergent, from different cultural backgrounds, or naturally flirtatious—manage to participate in EA without repeatedly making others uncomfortable.”
Yes, this is true. Do you think that the piece doesn’t acknowledge this? eg here:
”I’ve always been told I don’t have a great grasp of personal space. In some sense I don’t know what your experience of it is. How do you know how close to stand? Can you feel, somewhere, that someone is crowding you? Can you sense when they move back? I can start to notice some of that, but only if I’m really paying attention. And mostly I am not.”
My point is that I can both care about people and hurt them and so seek to remove myself from the situation? Is your point that I don’t actually care? Or that there is some obvious low risk path I can take short of removing myself? I think I’m missing the implication here? What do you think the obvious next step is?
I am confused by this.
You attribute a sense to me: “I’m sorry you’re sad, but I endorse my actions and may continue them.”
This piece is about how I’ve largely stopped attending EA events. I don’t intend to continue these actions. Also I explicitly do not endorse many of these actions “I would take it back if I could.”
Perhaps you mean that it seems like I intend to continue being social and occasionally touching my friends on the arm or making slightly flirty jokes outside of the EA community. I am more careful these days, but yes I do. Is this your issue?
You say “Many men—including those who are neurodivergent, from different cultural backgrounds, or naturally flirtatious—manage to participate in EA without repeatedly making others uncomfortable.”
Yes, this is true. Do you think that the piece doesn’t acknowledge this? eg here:
”I’ve always been told I don’t have a great grasp of personal space. In some sense I don’t know what your experience of it is. How do you know how close to stand? Can you feel, somewhere, that someone is crowding you? Can you sense when they move back? I can start to notice some of that, but only if I’m really paying attention. And mostly I am not.”
My point is that I can both care about people and hurt them and so seek to remove myself from the situation? Is your point that I don’t actually care? Or that there is some obvious low risk path I can take short of removing myself? I think I’m missing the implication here? What do you think the obvious next step is?