Thanks for making this. I experienced similar struggles in young adulthood and watched my friends go through them as well. It sucks that so many institutions leave young people with bad models of job-world and inflexible epistemology. It hits when we most need self-reliance and accuracy. IMO, the university professors are the worst offenders.
My disorganized thoughts
Trusting your own models is invaluable. When I was 25 I had a major breakdown from career stress (read about it here). I realized my choices had been unimpeachable and bad. I always did “what I was supposed to do”. But the outcomes would have been better if I trusted my own models.
There aren’t consolation prizes for following socially approved world models. There are just outcomes. I decided to trust my own evidence and interpretation much more after that.
It stuns me how often young people under-apply for jobs. The costs of over-applying are comparatively small. How to talk my friends out of it?
I’m not sure you took risks, in an emotional sense. Under-applying protects against rejection. Loyalty protect against abandonment. In the moment, applying to an additional job and exploring a new career path feel very risky. I generally encourage young people to apply for tons of things, try new fields and move to new (developing) countries. I believe the strategies that feel risky are often the most effective, since they differentiate you and offer new skills. Maybe “risk” is the wrong heuristic for young people, who understand the world too little.
Thanks for making this. I experienced similar struggles in young adulthood and watched my friends go through them as well. It sucks that so many institutions leave young people with bad models of job-world and inflexible epistemology. It hits when we most need self-reliance and accuracy. IMO, the university professors are the worst offenders.
My disorganized thoughts
Trusting your own models is invaluable. When I was 25 I had a major breakdown from career stress (read about it here). I realized my choices had been unimpeachable and bad. I always did “what I was supposed to do”. But the outcomes would have been better if I trusted my own models.
There aren’t consolation prizes for following socially approved world models. There are just outcomes. I decided to trust my own evidence and interpretation much more after that.
It stuns me how often young people under-apply for jobs. The costs of over-applying are comparatively small. How to talk my friends out of it?
I’m not sure you took risks, in an emotional sense. Under-applying protects against rejection. Loyalty protect against abandonment. In the moment, applying to an additional job and exploring a new career path feel very risky. I generally encourage young people to apply for tons of things, try new fields and move to new (developing) countries. I believe the strategies that feel risky are often the most effective, since they differentiate you and offer new skills. Maybe “risk” is the wrong heuristic for young people, who understand the world too little.