I felt deserted by the very community I’d given so much to. Nobody reached out; nobody seemed to care. It was a profound isolation I had never anticipated.
I’ve felt that too. I didn’t have the exact same scenario of losing funding; I lost a job. I hadn’t yet built a support network, and without the income from that job I couldn’t afford to live in big expensive city. Former colleagues who had previously been friendly never contacted me again; they never said “hey, I saw this job posting that I think you would be good for.” People I had interacted with at EA social events didn’t contact me. People who had reached out to me for one-on-ones at conferences no longer did so. I assume that they only reached out to me previously because I was associated with a prestigious institution, which made me feel used as a means to an end rather than as an end in myself.
It makes me think about “Diversity is being invited to the party; inclusion is being asked to dance.” There were plenty of “parties” that I was able to access (conferences, Slack workspaces, chat groups), but I wasn’t “asked to dance.”
What I perceive as the lack of welcomingness has made me pretty sad at times.
I’ve felt that too. I didn’t have the exact same scenario of losing funding; I lost a job. I hadn’t yet built a support network, and without the income from that job I couldn’t afford to live in big expensive city. Former colleagues who had previously been friendly never contacted me again; they never said “hey, I saw this job posting that I think you would be good for.” People I had interacted with at EA social events didn’t contact me. People who had reached out to me for one-on-ones at conferences no longer did so. I assume that they only reached out to me previously because I was associated with a prestigious institution, which made me feel used as a means to an end rather than as an end in myself.
It makes me think about “Diversity is being invited to the party; inclusion is being asked to dance.” There were plenty of “parties” that I was able to access (conferences, Slack workspaces, chat groups), but I wasn’t “asked to dance.”
What I perceive as the lack of welcomingness has made me pretty sad at times.
Sending you virtual hugs.