Great choice of a real-life event to dramatize! I also like that it’s from the bear’s perspective, even if that required some enhanced powers of perception. Nice writing style too.
Andrew Sharo
Karma: 3
Hi Wertion! Nice work making interesting a topic that is often dark and certainly avoided. I have several, mostly disconnected thoughts: I feel like you have a real natural, fluid writing style that was easy to read. I liked that you infused emotion into your story, where others may have taken a drier, logical path. I appreciated your content warning at the front. I felt some companionship between this piece and the work ‘When breath becomes air’. I personally enjoyed the meta-aspects of your writing (the references to the competition itself and EA broadly) although it could be confusing if read by someone not familiar with the competition or EA. +1 util to you for the experience I felt while reading your work.
Thanks Jack for this comment! I’m very happy to hear that you enjoyed the story.
I had never even considered that this story in itself could be dangerous, but I can see what the biorisk folks are getting at. But as you point out with Bond, they would need to do an enormous amount of policing to have much impact. Hopefully, they don’t see my story as dangerous...
I’m sorry to hear about your story getting scrapped, but I wish you good luck in walking the line between promoting biorisk thinking and not giving ammunition to folks who would try to do something harmful. I’ll try to do the same! It’s a worthwhile paradox to consider.
This is a very interesting concept, writing a biography of someone who doesn’t yet exist, but we hope could/will exist. I find it oddly inspiring :) Although I hope it doesn’t take until 2050 to ban factory farms in the US! My only criticism is the story itself did not grip me. It felt more like a list of accomplishments than a dramatic story. I rarely really felt what Ella was feeling, except when you mentioned the backlash she faced representing the chatbot. But that may be my own limited empathy. I thought it was an interesting choice for her to have children and grandchildren, since so many EA folks I know are childfree. But maybe Ella is more relatable that way?