I love this question, and I’m looking forward to reading others’ answers! Thanks for asking it! The 7 Laws of Magical Thinking: How Irrational Beliefs Keep Us Happy, Healthy, and Sane by Matthew Hutson
I was wrestling with the inescapable thought “I don’t want to live as a hypocrite” before I first read it in 2012. I hadn’t known becoming more rational was a thing other people knew how to do. Somehow the book’s cheerful, mostly forgiving take on how sometimes people are better off irrational gave me the grace I needed to both start seeking ways of mind I could respect in myself, and to appreciate my magical thinking. This book set me up with a growth mindset toward becoming a mind I enjoy. Biopunk by Marcus Wohlsen This really stretched my imagination about what a single competent person can do. I picked it up for the biology, and ended up thinking about agency, responsibility, risk, and the archetype of the maverick.
I think I’d have learned this stuff another way if I hadn’t read these books. However, these genuinely contributed to me growing in openness, agency, and self-respect.